20 TOP SECRETS TO SUSTAINABLE RELATIONSHIP PART ONE; WHAT YOU MUST DO NOW!!
1. TAKE RESPONSIBILITIES OF YOUR ACTIONS TOGETHER.
Accountable for whatever you do in the relationship, whether it’s good or bad. If you want to have a long healthy marriage, then it’s my suggestion that instead of blaming the other person or being irresponsible, you own up to whatever and however you are. That will be a matured as well as a romantic way to connect with your partner and work towards happiness and sadness and be there for both equally.
2.AGREE TO DISAGREE
It’s not necessary that since two persons have married, both of their mindsets have to be equal, and they have to agree mutually on whatever choices and opportunities that come in their way. Two humans cannot think similarly, that’s the normal psychological behavior. It’s okay if he doesn’t like the movie “Sex and the City” and it’s also okay if she doesn’t like watching the NBA. Mutual acceptance rather than agreement is what’s more important and necessary for a couple to have a happy marriage.
3.GIVE MORE AND EXPECT LESS FROM YOUR PARTNER.
Give more than receiving from your partner.
Give more than receiving from your partner.
This form of act helps a lot in doing away with negativity and feelings of despair and hatred. Showering your partner with love and happiness, buying her a favorite cosmetic, buying him at the baseball cap of his favorite player – these acts of giving blooms into a consolidated marriage. Everyone loves gifts and sometimes or the other, it’s nice to show that love by getting them what they deserve, maybe even more than that.
4. HAVE THE MINDSET I 'LL BE THERE FOR YOU!
Always remember that none of us perfect, everyone has their flaws and problems. You just need to be ideal for each other. Quoting the opening theme song of Friends TV series, all that we need in a marriage is to stick with each other, even when the world is against the two. Remembering that someone will always be there for you is what keeps you going in life. This helps in looking beyond our behaviors, problems and concentrating on leading a happy and healthy life together
5. STUDY HOW TO LIVE WITHOUT EXPECTATIONS.
Expectations lead to unnecessary implications. Your partner is to be with you, not to entertain you for your purposes. Do not demand things which will lead to marriage troubles. You need to lead your life, and so does your spouse. Do not get bored. Be content with how you and your partner are and treat each other with that mutual respect and trust. That is the best marriage advice any person can give you.
6. DON'T THINK OF DIVORCE.
That word is strictly forbidden in your dictionary of a happy marriage. Whenever you are stepping into that new world of living together with your partner, don’t even think of the negative thoughts such as what are your options and might happen if the marriage doesn’t turn out to be good. Be optimistic and positive in nature – You are marrying him or her because you want to spend the rest of your life together. That’s enough concrete reason not to think of divorce or any other negativity.
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7.STAY THE SAME NEVER FORCE OTHER TO CHANGE.
The most common thing that happens to a majority of marriages is that one will force the other to change to suit his or her behavior and patterns. Don’t do that. Every person is unique in their way. A change in behavior or a specific pattern will lead to a lot of complications as one will then have to adjust to the other. True, that’s necessary to a marriage, but a nagging is not to watch the matches late at night or go out shopping for a long time will lead to deep contempt and remorse.
8. CHERISH THE MOMENT YOU SPEND TOGETHER.
Nothing lasts forever; we will all die at some point in time or the other. Hence, it’s better to make the most of our time that we spend together and live to our fullest. It’s not necessary to stay angry and grumpy with one another all the while; it will affect your life even outside your marriage. Instead, be happy that you have each other and stay focussed on your married life and strive to ensure that it’s working correctly for each other.
9. SHARING IS CARING.
One of the most essential features in a marriage is that there are no secrets. Everything that happens in your life – your daily work, your professional life, your recreational time, your time spent with others – it helps a great deal if both the partners can just talk to each other and let them know of their happenings. There is no point in hiding anything; the other will get to know soon enough as you are both living under the same roof, which brings us to the next point.
10. LIVE AS A UNIFY TEAM.
Get over individualism and learn to accept things together. Do everything together- wash the dishes, iron the clothes, go to a movie, work at home, eat and sleep. Being in each other’s company is the primary essence of marriage. For young adults, it’s always a good step ahead if you start your married life in this manner – working together and cooperating with each other would soon make way to a better mutual understanding of each other. And that’s the most important requirement for a successful and happy marriage.
11. SHOW YOUR AFFECTION FOR EACH OTHER.
It doesn’t hurt to show your love for each other. Whenever you get the opportunity, hug and kiss her. Whenever you cuddle with each other, hold him tight and shower your love over him. Do not forget to mention how much you love each other. These little touches of affection will always break down even the toughest of walls from each other. No barriers are high enough to hold back your feelings for each other. Romance is the best marriage advice for any couple- young or old.
12.BE CREATIVE
Sometimes it’s not the money but the thought and effort put into a particular work that matters the most. Gift your better half something unique and innovative that will make him or her savor your present. It can be something very simple and plain, but close to your heart. Make your partner remember that you haven’t forgotten about each other and that you will be there for each other, no matter what happens- you will stand by each other’s side.
13. YOUR PARTNER WILL RESPOND TO HOW YOUR ARE.
It’s not an argument or fights are a one way thing- you can’t clap with one hand. Your partner will respond to how you behave and will think and act accordingly. So it’s the best thing if you live and treat your husband or wife well, then he or she will reciprocate accordingly. The same can be said of ill-treatment and misunderstandings as well. Your partner is a mirror of what you are and how you behave with each other.
14.LISTEN TO EACH OTHER.
In case there is an argument, make it a point to listen to each other carefully. Yes one of you might have a great and valid point, but most of us are too busy to argue that we hardly care to even listen. Keen and intent listening can resolve the majority of your problems before they escalate into a major one. Hear her points out, listen to what he has to say as well- then both of you can act out accordingly. Take this tip as it is extremely helpful in resolving others life problems as well.
15.MOVE OUT FOR DINNERS AND DATES.
Remember those old times before marriage? When you used to go out with your loved one for a dinner or lunch? Or the movie in the nearby theatre? Or maybe just for shopping in the malls? Well, continue with that. Don’t stop after marriage and rekindle your old love life as it was. Go for a late night candle light dinner or a romantic movie. Treat yourselves at your favorite restaurant. Food can take away plenty of your worries at hand, and that’s a true story.
16. TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER.
Always stick by each other’s side and take care of one another. Be the shoulder to lean on when she is unhappy, be the lap to lie on when he is tired. Do each other’s duties and willingly take on the others’ responsibilities if he or she feels sick- let each other know that you have got your backs. Heal your husband’s or wife’s scars and be the medicine in his or her times of need.
17. NEVER FORGET YOUR PROMISES,KEEP IT.
Married couples at large tend to forget a lot about the relationship they used to share before marriage. Don’t forget, marriage is just a relationship with legal permission and a written paper. That doesn’t mean you will break the old ties and bicker away with each other. You fell in love for the way he or she appealed to you- do not let go of that. Be the same old guy and a girl who stayed up late with each other during nights and used Skype in long distance relationships. Those are the moments which are meant to be relived again.
18. LOOK AT YOUR OWN FAULTS BEFORE BLAMING YOUR PARTNER.
This is a common advice, both married and unmarried life. Before you play the blame game for damaging the television set or breaking the dishes, look into your faults for once. Did you do something with the TV before she turned it on? Had you placed the dishes properly and safely before he took them? Sometimes we are to blame for our problems, it is better not to take it out on anyone, especially your spouse.
19.BUILD GOOD RELATIONSHIP.
A good relationship is the first and foremost criteria for an everlasting marriage. The house will stay only if the base and foundation are strong. Marriages are the same. You need to understand and trust each other to lead a good life. Sort out each others problems and have mutual respect for one another. Trust and be loyal to each other and develop a strong couple relationship between each other as husband and wife. Otherwise, your marriage will be just another house of cards, waiting to crumble.
20.DON'T TAKE FAIR AS FOUL AND VICE VERSA.
What you think is fair for you might not be fair for him or her. And what you think is wrong with you might not be the same for the other as well. Perspectives differ and so makes opinions. For example, you might not think it’s fair that she goes to work, for you feel that there is no need for that as you will provide for her necessities. On the other hand, she might think that it’s wrong to just sit at home as she wants to be independent. Take a tip, sort out these differences beforehand.
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